2013 is almost ending and I have to say this has been one amazing and horrible year for me.

I have dealt with a lot of pain and agony during my seven months in college, I questioned if I had made the right friends, if it was right for me to continue theater and if I really wanted my course. There were times when I was at the tip of ending my life early because of so many fucking problems that just pile up everyday. I couldn’t handle the stress, the sleepless nights and the exhaustion. I just couldn’t. My life right now was more oppressive than before. And if ever you want to be in my position…. you’d make the biggest mistake of your life. You’d have to deal with people who will doubt your skills, your capability in anything, they’ll call you WEAK, STUPID, CARELESS, etc. It’s too much judgement to handle.

Well enough of that.

Despite the misery, I have to talk about the amazing blossoming parts of 2013. I’m thankful that I’ve spent an amazing amount of time with friends whom I haven’t seen in awhile, known for a long time and have just met. For some reason, these people kept me alive and breathing still. The friends that I have are very supportive, are very fun to be with and they make me happy. I’ve experienced lots of mishaps with them this year and I’ve learned a lot from my tortured happenings; that is to never give up. Yes. I want to end my life early. But I still have little hope in my body that keeps me up in my feet. After all, your life isn’t interesting without a challenge right?

Anyway, better things will happen in 2014, I hope this will be the year that I’ll finally be responsible and aware of everything around me. Balance is hard to do but I’ll give it another shot since I’ve come so far. Thank you 2013. You were one bitchy year yet a stupendous one.

20131231-201029.jpgCan’t wait to read all of these when midnight strikes! This is my treasure box filled with good memories in 2013 hihi.

Happy New Year everyone!!


About Shen Fernandez

I'm an indecisive fool who is trying to be a better writer.
This entry was posted in Happiness, Negativity, Thoughts and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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